Is it possible to be engaging at 7:30 a.m.?
The summer being nearly over, I have been giving some thought to facing
students again. Which is a daunting prospect, not because my students
ask so many questions, but rather because they don't ask any questions
at all.
"How can that be?" you say. "What kind of lecturer are you? Can't
you make your lectures interesting, crack a few jokes, engage the
students, create a free -wheeling atmosphere of give-and-take with
ideas swirling around like confetti in the wind?" The answer is no,
it can't be done.
In the first place, my class is at 7:30 a.m., an excellent time for
robins, say, but not so good for people. Ideas do not flit around the
room at 7:30 a.m., witty, repartee is seldom heard at dawn, stifled
yawning does not make for snappy discourse.
In the second place, none of my students wants to take this class. It
is riddled with mathematics, which they consider tasteless and
intrusive. I have no problem with that; I realize that the harmony of
the spheres can't compete with Hootie and the Blowfish. I myself would
rather go sailing, but engineers need weird and repulsive math, and
somebody has to teach it.
In the third place, in a science class there are basically no
controversial opinions to be bandied about. Not about fundamentals.
Things are as they are and if you don't believe that, you can go
outside and see for yourself. Physics is monotonously true. Which
makes it a lot less exciting than, say, literature and philosophy where
the word "why" sets off an infinite regression of opinions. You can't
even deconstruct science--not that some people haven't tried. Let's
face it, science is unbelievably uncool.
So where is all this leading up to? Nowhere really, other than to
grouse a little about the end of summer and the general state of the
world. Which has not been kind to me of late, seeing that on my
vacation in Canada I almost stepped on a rattlesnake. Which I had
difficulty seeing because my eyes were swollen with mosquito bites.
Also, this rattlesnake had different markings than our rattlesnakes.
So much for NAFTA! Then, when I came home and wanted to go sailing,
I discovered that mice had shredded my sail during the winter. So much
for the great Web of Life!
And finally I find out that I have to teach a class at 7:30 in the
morning. A class that is proudly mathematical. To students who hate
math. In the rosy-fingered dawn, we will be staring at each other
with sleep-glazed eyes. No questions will be asked. Ah, for the Life
of the Mind at daybreak!
At Random - Adrian Korpel
